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- You can still figure out what you want in 2023. Here's how.
You can still figure out what you want in 2023. Here's how.
It’s not too late to decide what you want in 2023. Just like we don’t magically need reading glasses the morning we wake up on our 40th birthdays or find ourselves turning into our mothers in the blink of an eye, there’s nothing super duper special about the minute the clock strikes 12:01 on January first.
What I mean to say is, It’s okay to ease into the new year, especially if that feels right to you. But what if you’re not sure what feels right to you? I get it.
The “shoulds” coming at us from so many directions make it really hard to listen to the small, wise voice inside of us. I see this all the time in my coaching practice; If there’s anything standing between women and the practice of intuitive eating, it’s that voice in our heads telling us we shouldn’t be fat. That if we gain weight, it’s a sign that we’re weak, lazy, and unloveable, that salads are “good” and cake is “bad.” (Murder is bad. Hitting a parked car and driving away without leaving a note is bad. Eating cake is not.)
We’ve been taught from a young age, both implicitly and explicitly, that bigger bodies are wrong and that if we’re just disciplined enough, we can manipulate our bodies into the “ideal” size and shape.
But that’s just what the 72-billion-dollar a year diet industry wants us to believe. The truth is, dieting is the most significant predictor of weight gain.
So what do you do when you want to listen to your own intuition but the “should’s” — whether they’re coming from diet culture, the perfectionist tendencies that keep you from feeling inadequate, or your Great Aunt Sally — get in the way?
Here’s a technique I use with my intuitive eating coaching clients that can be used with food or anything else in your life.
1| Sit in a quiet place where you can relax.
2| Take a few deep breaths.
3| Imagine taking one of the actions you have in mind. That could be eating a particular food, embarking on a new project, or having a difficult conversation. When you imagine it, shut your eyes, visualize yourself doing it, and engage as many of your senses as possible, including taste, smell, and sound. Once the image is clear in your mind, take a couple more deep breaths.
4| Notice how you feel in your body. Are you feeling tightness anywhere? Do you feel relaxed? What do you notice when you check in with your heart?
5| If you’re still not clear on what your body is saying, try steps 3 and 4 again, but this time, visualize yourself after you’ve taken the action in question.
Nothing makes me happier than hearing from my newsletter gang (i.e. YOU)! If you have a second, hit reply and let me know what “should’s” you want to let go of (including any food rules) and/or what’s exciting to you in 2023.
I’ll go first: I want to let go of procrastinating on social media and learn to rollerskate backward. (There’s more — way more — but that could be a whole other newsletter!)
xo,
Pam
P.S. If you’d like to let go of restrictive eating habits and food-related guilt in the new year, let’s talk. I offer 1:1 intuitive eating coaching, and it would be an honor to support you in your journey. Click here for details.
4 Things Worth Checking Out
If you have 30 seconds: Ever have an idea that won't leave you alone? This one-day retreat for women who want to make peace with food is mine. Please check it out, sign up, and/or share it with a friend. (And if you're interested, don't wait to register, as I'm keeping it super small.)
If you have 4 minutes: I did a segment on 9News Denver on how to start intuitive eating. (I was nervous as h ell but I think I nailed it and I'm not apologizing for that!)
If you have 6 minutes: Fellow freelance writer Gina Rich wrote this helpful article on how to talk about body neutrality with kids and why it matters — and she included my thoughts.
If you have an hour: I am loving this conversation between Virginia Sole-Smith (anti-diet culture author and journalist) and Aubrey Gordon (best known as Maintenance Phase co-host), in advance of Gordon's latest book, "You Just Need to Lose Weight (and 19 Other Myths About Fat People) (And thanks to my good friend Sarah Howlett for recommending it)
The Real Fit podcast features real conversations with women athletes on topics like body image and confidence, my goal is to share stories that will let you know you're not alone and that you're already enough. Listen on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and anywhere you listen to juicy podcasts. New episodes every other Tuesday.
Are you ready to heal your relationship with food and exercise?
I’m on a mission to help smart women like you stop wasting your precious energy on the quest to shrink your body. You were made to do amazing things and your obsession with food, exercise, and body image is a huge distraction.Together we can clear that mental clutter and turbocharge your path to being your best self.I'm a certified intuitive eating counselor, occupational therapist, and certified personal trainer and I offer 1:1 intuitive eating coaching services.
Thank you so much for inviting me into your inbox.
If you appreciate receiving this newsletter, my podcast, or any of the other content I'm creating,you can show your gratitudeby treating me to a cup of coffee.
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