Make room for joy

Life is for living, not optimizing.

I’ve been secretly dying to try stand-up comedy for… basically ever. But it never seemed like the right time or the right fit. Reasons (read: excuses) included but were not limited to:

I’m too busy.

I won’t be funny.

I need to write “real” words people will pay me for, not jokes people may or may not laugh at. 

Who do I think I am, the Marvelous Mrs.Maizel??? I’m not a 1950s housewife, this will never work. 

(Just kidding about that last one.)

But here I am, about to do it anyway (on Sunday, December 10th at Junkyard Social!). I signed up for a stand-up class at the absolute last minute—as in a week after it started—jumped in, and just started swimming. Or dog paddling. Or whatever it is when you don’t know what the hell you’re doing but you’re having so much fun even if it’s a little uncomfortable.

It helped that every single member of the all-women class was kind, supportive, and quick to offer helpful feedback. It also helped that each of them is wildly funny. Every Monday night, I not only got a chance to hog the spotlight for 10 minutes while sharing my work, but I also got to laugh my face off listening to them.

What I’m saying is, I am having so much fun. 

This isn’t about earning money or checking something off my to-do list (unless you count my bucket list.) This isn’t about networking, career advancement, or anything beyond seeking joy. 

As I write this, it is the day before my 45th birthday. I don’t mind getting older, but as I said to my husband this morning, “I guess I’m just a little closer to death now.” Which means I just want to suck all the juice I can out of every day I’m still here. And even though I have this feeling I’m going to live until I’m 105, who knows? I know there are no guarantees.

So eat the birthday cake. Have seconds (or thirds or whatever) at Thanksgiving. Eat piles of Bubby’s matzo latkes or your Nana’s Christmas cookies. Sure, food is fuel, but you don’t have to wait until you’re starving or even hungry to eat, because food is so much more than fuel. 

Food is connection. It’s tradition, it’s love, and it’s joy. And it’s okay—actually it is your birthright—to enjoy food without guilt. You don’t have to do a Turkey Trot to “earn” your Thanksgiving dinner or an extra long workout or a cleanse to make up for it. 

Everything in your life — whether it’s a standup comedy class, a pottery class, a dip in the lake, or a generous slice of pecan pie with vanilla ice cream — doesn’t have to be about efficiency or productivity. Hustle culture doesn’t want you to know this, but life isn’t for optimizing, my friends. It’s for living.

xo,

PS I really love hearing from readers. (It’s just me on the other side of the reply button.) Feel free to write me back and say hi or tell me what your favorite Thanksgiving food is. (Mine is stuffing.)

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