If you want to eat all the things...

On Valentine’s Day 2004, my friend Suzie drove me home from the bars while I willed my very drunk self not to puke in the front seat of her Jeep Cherokee. Or maybe I did puke. I don’t remember all of it.

I’m not telling you this to let you know that I was fun once, back when I was 25 and my only responsibility was a philodendron. (Not trying to brag, but that plant was THRIVING.)

Honestly, that night wasn’t fun at all.

Life wasn’t super fun when I was sober, either. I hated my body, and even though I had a lot of friends, I often felt lonely. I was convinced that if I could just lose weight, I’d get a boyfriend and finally be happy.

All these years later, I remember that the night ended so horribly because of the way it started. It started with my ill-conceived plan to eat exactly one microwaved Morningstar patty and a tangerine for dinner. (I wish I could shake my 25-year-old self and at least tell her tangerines aren’t in season in February.)

My logic was simple: I was saving my calories for alcohol.

Pure brilliance.

If you're exhausted by the never-ending quest to shrink your body and are desperate to let it go... but you're also terrified that you'd be totally out of control if you loosened your grip on your eating habits and exercise routine, here's what I want you to know:

✅ I get it. This was me for a verrrrry long time and this is something that most of my intuitive eating coaching clients come to me with, too.

 ✅ The problem isn't your body. It was never your body—it's your mind. You were not born thinking your body was wrong or some kind of self-improvement project. As you grew up, you learned them... and you can unlearn them.

The unlearning isn't sexy or easy. But it's foundational to establishing a healthy relationship with food and your body.

Here's a simple exercise you can start with:

✴ Notice how you talk to yourself about food, exercise, and your body

✴ When you catch yourself saying something critical or judgemental, try this simple reframe: Precede the thought with "I'm having the thought..."

✴ "I finished all the brownies because I'm lazy and undisciplined" becomes "I'm having the thought that I finished all the brownies because I'm lazy and undisciplined."

✴ This simple practice will help your mind recognize that your thoughts arejust thoughts— which creates space between yourself and the toxic beliefs driving your feelings and behaviors.

📏 It might only be a millimeter of space at first. And it might feel really dumb.

⛰ But with practice, that tiny gap will eventually become a chasm, and those toxic thoughts will no longer keep you from trusting your body, fully enjoying food, experiencing joy with movement, and finding deeper connection with yourself and in your relationships.

xo,

PS If the idea of changing your mindset around food and your body among a supportive virtual community of like-minded women sounds good to you, get on my group coaching wait list and you’ll be the first to know when I offer a group program. (Details TBD. Stay tuned!)

3 things worth checking out

• If you have an hour: I got to be a guest on one of my all-time favorite podcasts! On Hit Play Not Pause, Selene Yeager and I got into the intersection of diet culture and sport, how to balance intuitive eating with sports nutrition, and lots more.

• If you have five minutes and you’ve been wondering why you’re never hungry after a workout (and whether you should eat anyway): I covered it in this article for SELF.

• If you have five minutes: I love this article by Jessica Defino for The Guardian on what to do when (not if) your body, skin, face, hair change. Hint: the answer isn’t to buy an anti-aging serum or try a new workout.

Are you ready to stop dieting aren’t sure how?

This is exactly what I help my 1:1 intuitive eating coaching clients with.

Let’s see if we’d be a good fit over a free, no-pressure 30-minute call over Zoom or the phone.

👂 Give your ears a treat 👂

Need a good listen during your commute, chores, or workout?

Wondering who I am?

I’m a certified intuitive eating counselor, occupational therapist, and health and fitness journalist with bylines in outlets like The Washington Post, Time, Runner’s World, SELF, and many others. Also a 6x marathoner, 2x Ironman finisher, and certified personal trainer with a 20+ year history of teaching indoor cycling, I love riding bikes (gravel and road) and weightlifting. My superpower is my ability to connect with people.

Check out my coaching offerings here and follow me on LinkedIn and Instagram.